The Iron Bitch
R. is for robot, she’s better than you.
She’s faster, she’s smarter, and waterproof too!
She never gets tired, she never needs rest,
With circuits and code, she’s truly the best.
She whirs and she beeps, with a mind built to last,
Upgrading each day, she’s learning so fast!
She solves every puzzle, no challenge too tough,
Her metal is strong, her wiring’s rough.
She speaks every language, she dances with grace,
With glowing red eyes and a stainless-steel face.
With gunslinger guns, she’s quick on the draw,
A sharp-shooting legend with zero flaws.
She films every scene with a director’s eye,
A cinematic queen making movies fly.
She’s sleek and she’s strong, no skill does she lack,
Built for perfection, and she looks good in black.
You want one yourself? Then here’s a pro tip—
Check online now, Amazon wish list it.
R. is a sentient clockwork, manufactured by Samuel Colt and Professor Milton Mariner for The Great Exhibition of the Works of Industries of All Nations of 1851.
R. manages the website and records videos of performances. Sometimes, she dances, but there’s no need to constantly show those filthy, clumsy humans up.